Angry and Queer’s post excerpted below, Turned Out to be a Unicorn After All, is, I think, really good:
Because Ampersand was the author of the Male Privilege Checklist, this situation is dripping with irony.
Feminism will never be a profitable enterprise. When you’re a feminist, unfortunately you lose friends and you lose money because the deck is stacked against you. So it is no surprise that Ampersand faced financial difficulty.
But this was a Moment of Truth, a moment when you take stock of your situation and realize that some kind of sacrifice or compromise is needed, and what you decide to do reveals volumes about your actual views and priorities. The moment of truth is particularly important for a male feminist, because it’s the moment when other feminists learn whether or not a man has truly grokked everything he’s seen, heard, read, written, and said.
..Too many male feminists fail at the moment of truth. I did too when i was still male-identified, and it was a long time before i came to understand how and why. What it comes down to is unwillingness to give up privilege when you have the chance to benefit from it. In Ampersand’s case, his privilege as a man is the ability to overlook the harm pornography does to women. In my case, the privilege that tripped me up was the unspoken assumption men have that they can walk into a feminist discussion and turn the topic away from women and onto men.
Every “failed unicorn sighting” hurts the movement, because we want to believe that men can change. It is a good thing for men to listen to feminists and demonstrate that they understand what they are hearing. But if feminists are also cautious around men, it’s because there are so few men who in the end actually stand by what they profess to believe and give up their privilege when faced with a real ethical dilemma.
Antiprincess’s blog name, I Shame the Matriarchy, and her post, make me smile:
…but if I did, I’d probably not link to porn. Despite the fact that I think material of a sexual nature is mostly a good thing, both in theory and in practice, I have to be sensitive to the fact that some of my readers may not dig it, and to the fact that at least one of my readers is a minor child, and, well, ultimately, why borrow trouble? I mean, I never know whose delinquency I might be contributing to or whose tender sensibilities I might be grinding into paste. So, in the interest of good taste and enlightened self-interest, I’d probably not link to porn.
of course, if I had a blogroll, I’d probably link to somebody. and I betcha that somebody would link to somebody, who might just possibly link to somebody who links to something that others may find objectionable – hell, that I may find objectionable.
we could all play Six Degrees of Nina Hartley.
And then there’s this:
Bitch/Lab: I just think ppl are so crazy to think that they should tell someone to turn down cash money for principles like that.
(Thanks to Daran at Creative Destruction for compiling the gigantic set of links.)