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Pre-2008 Posts

Male Terrorism, Domestic: Battered Woman Jailed, Addict “Boyfriend” Walks


Via Y Carrington:

And now for male terrorism on the homefront: This nightmarish tale of domestic violence, child abuse, and state-seized children out of good ole Pennsylvania.

Imperialism and patriarchy: two revolting tastes that taste revolting together.

More details from this article:

Police arrived at Graham [the woman] and Troop’s [the “boyfriend’s”] apartment at about 3:30 a.m. on Oct. 8, finding broken household items, furniture knocked over and paramedics treating Jarron [the baby]. 

Graham told investigators she was out drinking the night before and argued with Troop when she got home. The argument turned to shoving and pushing.

As Jarron lay in bed wrapped in a blanket, police say, Graham grabbed the infant and swung him at Troop.  … Troop punched her in the eye.   Graham called 911.

Graham was jailed in lieu of $75,000 bail, charged with aggravated assault, endangering the welfare of children, simple assault and reckless endangerment. ..

Scarpitti [the woman’s attorney] said her client was traumatized and kept inquiring about Jarron and her other children…

David Agresti, defense co-counsel, believes there’s no doubt that Graham is a victim of domestic abuse. “Neighbors have stated it was routine at the house,” he said. Police are investigating. ..

Graham has no criminal record; Troop was arrested in June and charged with possession of crack cocaine and other crimes for allegedly fleeing from police after being involved in a domestic dispute, court records indicate. He faces a preliminary hearing in November. .. 

Graham’s other children, ranging in age from 9 to 1, are in the custody of their maternal grandmother, Gloria Graham. Troop is the father of the 1-year-old and Jarron. ..

Scarpitti says Graham remembers little about the incident.   “She remembers walking in that night and she remembers her baby after the incident,” Scarpitti said. “She doesn’t remember her time with police.” ..

“The facts are there’s an injured baby and (Graham) said she did it,” Kwitowski said. “The arguments come later.”




13 thoughts on “Male Terrorism, Domestic: Battered Woman Jailed, Addict “Boyfriend” Walks

  1. (Moved from other thread)

    God, Y Carrington. I had heard of this incident and having visited that link– why in god’s name didn’t the police arrest this “boyfriend.” He was addicted to crack cocaine and had abused her in the past, had a history of assault charges. SHE called police when he hit her. They came to the house and ARRESTED HER, black eye and all, took all her children away, though everybody says she was a good mom, and now she’s in jail. The guy freaking walks. Yes, what she did to her baby was horrible, but the baby is going to be okay, and she can’t remember it. She needs help with her alcohol issues and protection from this “boyfriend,” and her children need HER. Who KNOWS what they are going through wherever the state has placed them. Argh, I can’t stand it.


    Posted by womensspace | October 16, 2006, 10:13 am
  2. (Moved from other thread)

    Luckynkl Says:

    Ok, I’m a little confused here. The mother’s been drinking and remembers little to nothing about the incident. The police say she did this, she did that. Were the police there when it happened? No, the police were not. So WHO told them this is what happened?

    My guess is this is what the abusive boyfriend told the police. Because I notice the article doesn’t state that she told them this. It just says this is what the police say what happened without giving us any clue why the police came to this conclusion. Which I find a bit suspicious. Especially since I’ve lived in PA and have dealt with some of the most woman-hating cops, courts and judges that I have ever seen in my life. They don’t even try to hide their blatant, outright contempt for women. It didn’t take my ex long to size up the situation for women in PA. He said, “You know, I could beat the living shit out of you, and they’d all blame you for it.” I found out the hard way, he was right.

    A couple of years ago, I saw a list in which all the states were graded on their friendliness towards women. PA scored an “F” on its report card. I think only Mississippi did worse. In the town I lived, the fine for beating a woman was the exact same amout it was for kicking a dog. $100. And that was only if she had a protection order against him. Good luck in getting that. All the guy had to do is say he didn’t do it, and that was good enough for the judge. I wish I could say I was joking, but I’m not. And even when a woman did manage to get a protection order, they’d only fine these guys 27% of the time for violating it.

    During the years I spent in PA, and especially the months I spent at the dv shelter, I could curdle the fresh milk in your refrigerator with all I witnessed and experienced in that state. I felt like I had walked into the twilight zone and had been transported back in time to the Dark Ages. Women talk about being beaten like you and I talk about going to the store and buying a carton of milk. Like it’s the most natural thing in the world and just part of being a woman.

    So forgive me if I’m a bit skeptical about this article and that things happened the way the police are saying it did. I know better than to take the word of any cop in the state of PA. They hate women more than the civilians do. So I think the story just stinks from the word “go.” I think it’s a rather convenient way for an abuser to explain away a child’s fractured skull and why a woman has a black eye. I think it’s more likely that the boyfriend was responsible for the injuries to both.

    Posted by womensspace | October 16, 2006, 10:15 am
  3. Simple question: Why wasn’t the her boyfriend arrested for battery? I mean, damn—she has a black eye in her mug shot! What is up with this?

    Is there anything that we can do to speak out? She needs help, and lots of it.


    Posted by Y. Carrington | October 16, 2006, 10:52 am
  4. More details:

    According to WICU12 News in Erie, police claim to have a tape of her confession. The reporter’s exact words state thus: “Police can’t release the confession tape, but investigators told us what she said, during questioning.” Meanwhile, her lawyer told the media this:

    She (Graham) gave a statement to police, but she doesn’t remember what happened at this point (my emphasis). She will be evaluated by a psychiatrist.”

    Luckynkl hit the nail on the head: Shit ain’t right.

    Posted by Y. Carrington | October 16, 2006, 11:24 am
  5. In my county/town in the UK, it is not uncommon for the victim to be arrested along with the abuser. The logic is something along the lines of “we’ll sort it out down at the station” as if it were just ‘some argument’ that ‘got a little heated’. So an already traumatised victim then has to go through arrest, cell time, questioning etc.

    Certainly I agree with Luckynkl, where on earth did the police get their info on what happened? The abuser – coz we *know* they *never* lie.

    Posted by stormcloud | October 16, 2006, 12:00 pm
  6. It is possible that the abuser swung the baby at his mother, causing the mother’s black eye and the baby’s skull fracture all at once.

    Posted by Branjor | October 16, 2006, 3:05 pm
  7. I thought that too, Branjor.

    Posted by stormcloud | October 16, 2006, 7:26 pm
  8. she’s afraid he’ll kill her if she tells the truth.

    This is all too familiar for those of us who’ve been there.

    If you knew that next door, your neighbor was being beaten by the chump she lived with, and then you find out her little dog was killed, would you assume she did it?

    I was also living with a crack head when my baby was born. He had already showed me the exact dimensions of hell, and I was pretty much used to it, but the one thing I would never bear, the fear beyond fear, is if any threat came to the baby. Well one day he was in a drunken tirade and he took the baby to the porch and was swinging her, like he was about to throw her off, then he took her in his truck and left, it was the most horrible night of my life. We were living in a duplex his friend owned, his friend came home, and was talking on his cel with my baby daddy, and I pleaded with him to help me. Tell him to bring the baby back. He said “I don’t want to get involved in a domestic dispute.” The police came because I had been screaming outside and the neighbors called them. Fortunately the cops were very sympathetic to me and were trying to call him. They got tired of waiting, and they told me to call them when he came back. I knew calling them would be impossible. They said “say you have to go to the bathroom” which was funny, he knew all the tricks, there’s no way he’d let me go to the bathroom by myself or even get near the phone . After a couple hours, he did come back. He had an accident, the fender was dented, but the baby was OK. He tossed her at me, saying “I don’t want this”. Amazingly, she slept through the whole thing. Anyway, we went to bed. Then he said “did you tell the cops what my truck looked like?” I ran a few scenarios in my head to decide what to say, and realized this was my chance: I said YES I DID. SO he got up and ran to his truck to go park it elsewhere so the cops wouldn’t know he was home. That was my chance. I waited to hear him pull out then I bolted out the door to my car, put the baby in, got my keys, and turned the ignition, backed out of the driveway and as I was shifting to drive, just like in a movie, he suddenly showed up by my door, saying don’t go dont go please! He grabbed the handle, and I backed up and drove and he was hanging on to the handle, running, and I drove faster til he let go. I didn’t even have a baby seat. I had my cel and I called the cops and told them he was home. Then he called me, was so sad and sorry, etc. He kept talking til the police showed up and he said “Goodbye they’re here” I drove around for a while and went back, to look for his truck so I could get the baby seat from it, and to get the dog and my computer and some baby clothes and food, and my wallet. Then I drove away, it was 2 in the morning. All the hotels were full because of the housing shortage in the gulf region. I was still in pajamas, and forgot to get myself any clothes. My hair was in knots from getting yanked repetedly that night, so I looked like a real prize when I went to the dollar store the next morning to buy jeans and a brush. By the time I found a vacant hotel (all the hotels were full in the gulf region because of Katrina) it was 11 am, but you can’t book a hotel room at that hour, so I napped in a parking lot. After three days I made it to my mom’s house in Brooklyn.

    I couldn’t have done it if the cops hadn’t been on my side.

    Posted by saltyC | October 17, 2006, 1:53 am
  9. saltyC
    “she’s afraid he’ll kill her if she tells the truth”

    Most victims are. Usually because the abuser has demonstrated, one way or another, what he is capable of, and what is in the back of his mind.

    It is almost like they go to “Abusers’ School” or something.

    Sadly, fear of the safety of the children is the reason most victims get the courage to leave.

    Posted by stormcloud | October 18, 2006, 8:19 am
  10. people really don’t want to believe women are abused by the men they live with.

    Heather Mills was battered by Paul MCartney and the comments to this story are incredibly ignorant. Fans don’t want to believe he did it, or if they do, she drove him to it. Why didn’t she leave? Why didn’t she tell? They’re forgetting she did leave, she did tell. But to the extent that she didn’t, it was for the same reasons they don’t believe her.

    Posted by saltyC | October 18, 2006, 5:04 pm
  11. Abolutely horrifying. I wondered about this too. It seemed implausible to me that she swung the baby at him and what led them to think that in the first place? Bingo – he said so .

    Further, if this guy had been properly dealt with from the first this would not have happened at all. But no – it’s routine to let batterers off over and over again until someone gets killed.

    Mothers always get cited with a “failure to protect” the children when no one is trying to protect her from a batterer.

    It’s disgusting.

    Posted by Txfeminist | October 18, 2006, 5:15 pm
  12. It just seems like the police and DA’s in these cases, just jump on the band wagon when these cases araise. It’s like they can’t wait to have at these women, who are alleged to have hurt their kids. I think there is something fishy to this story. It pisses the hell out of me she is injail and the abuser is not.

    Notice how quick in these child abduction cases, the police and DA’s just jump right on these women, like something out of the Salem Witch Trials.

    Posted by Jackie | October 20, 2006, 2:12 am
  13. I don’t think the witch trials ever ended.

    Any woman who stands up to her abuser (or kills him) is treated like the most dangerous person who walks the earth, even though it is both understandable (after years of abuse) or justified self defence. Men need little ‘reason’ to be justified in killing women, and their reasons are pathetic (‘she was going to leave me’). And juries buy this shit.

    The added burden for battered women is that they do also get the blame for not protecting the children against this monster. Any abuse that happens to the children is ‘the fault’ of the mother because she didn’t protect them. The abuser is effectively made invisible, the focus goes onto ‘bad women’. Same in rape, the woman is supposed to stop the rape, or prevent the rape, and is effectively blamed for the rape if her efforts fail. Again, the perp is invisible.

    This poor woman should not be in jail. It is a gazillion to one that she was the one that swung the baby. And the word of a man, an abuser, is again taken over that of a woman.

    The last woman executed in the UK for being a ‘witch’ was in the 1940s in Scotland. These days, they don’t use the crime of ‘witch’, but use any and every excuse to apportion blame onto the woman.

    I cannot see that the witch trials ever ended, just morphed into other methods of woman-blame.

    Posted by stormcloud | October 20, 2006, 11:43 am

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