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Pre-2008 Posts

Today’s Male Terorrism: Father Murders 3-year-old Daughter in Revenge for Wife’s Affair

Millie Hall

This is a story, not of love gone wrong, not of love at all, not of infidelity, not of a broken or bad marriage.  This is about the way men terrorize women and girls.

Millie Hall, 3, pictured above, was recently drugged with narcotics, then suffocated to death by her “father,” who used a rag soaked in chloroform to take her life and who is now on trial for murder.  Her murderer, Gavin Hall, 33, was angry with Millie’s mother for having had sex with another man. 

Two days prior to murdering his daughter, Hall  killed two of the three family cats with chloroform, then hid them in the house.    He was a radiographer with access to chloroform.  Please also note he was a white male professional.  There was nothing unusual about him, he wasn’t a derelict, he wasn’t a bum, he wasn’t mentally ill, he was a successful, gainfully employed, middle class white guy.

Prior to and shortly after killing the family kitties, then murdering Millie,  he wrote letters and messages to all sorts of people.  He sent Millie’s mom a message which said, “I loved you. ..I’ve dealt with your deceit for two months, now you have the rest of your life to deal with the consequences.”

After Millie was dead he wrote to her mom:  “Millie sends her love.  She died at 3.32am.  She didn’t suffer, my pills and the chloroform saw to that. Myself, I expect to suffer, I deserve it.  Love till death us do part I said and this is what I meant.”

Hall intended to kill himself but failed, probably because he was discovered by Millie’s mom, who was a nurse and treated him when she found him in the living room bleeding from various cuts he’d inflicted on himself.  Prior to killing Millie and attempting to kill himself, he had written to his mother,  “I loved (my wife) so much I couldn’t entertain the idea of being without her…Sorry about Millie, needed the company.”

To Millie’s baby sister he wrote, “I couldn’t take you from your mum, she needs you now and you need her in the same way that I have Millie and Millie needs me.”

After he killed Millie, he got the dead kitties out from where he’d hidden them and laid them next to her body.

Hall had forced his wife to let him read through her computer exchanges with the man she’d had sex with after he’d learned of the encounters.  Before forcing her to let him read, he had smashed her cell phone.

salty submitted this newspaper story as a comment, but it needs its own post, I think.   I was going to simply paste excerpts of the newspaper article, but decided against it because of the way the writer obfuscated and masked what was clearly pure male terrorism and brutality.  This man?  He loved nobody — nobody — but himself.  He wanted his wife for himself.  She was, in his mind, his possession, as was his daughter, as were the two kitties he killed.  In his mind, he owned them all.  When Millie’s mom acted in her own self-interest by going outside of her marriage for sex with another man, this man’s ownership was threatened, and his response was to murder an innocent girl baby, innocent cats, then to blame it all on Millie’s mom.

He is asking for a ruling of manslaughter on the basis of diminished capacity rather than murder.  Right.   You write your mother, your wife, your boss and your daughter threatening and horrifying letters.  You kill two kitties two days ahead of the day you’ve chosen to kill your daughter.  You then go downstairs  while your wife is sleeping and you drug a little baby girl.  You then suffocate her until she dies.  If that isn’t premeditated murder, what is? 

All of this because twice your wife had sex with someone besides you.  She didn’t even divorce you.  She hadn’t even separated from you (though based on what I read she should have.  You were abusive, manipulative and violating. She was probably afraid you’d do something like what you did.) 

This isn’t a story of an “affair,” and no details should be introduced which make it any such story.  This isn’t a story about a heartbroken man, either.  This is a story about the way men terrorize women who refuse to be owned by them.  It is a story about the way so many men “love” their  wives and their daughters.

Link 

Heart

Discussion

26 thoughts on “Today’s Male Terorrism: Father Murders 3-year-old Daughter in Revenge for Wife’s Affair

  1. male terrorism is right.

    Posted by rabfish | October 28, 2006, 6:53 pm
  2. I cannot have my way syndrome.

    Posted by chasingmoksha | October 28, 2006, 8:31 pm
  3. And he did it two days before Millie’s birthday, I’m sure her mom had the birthday party all planned out, friends, presents, food, all picked out and looking forward to it.

    it reminds me of how Jon-Benet was murdered Christmas night. Male terrorists know the importance of children’s holidays, they need power not only over life and death, but over any possibility of happiness.

    Posted by saltyC | October 28, 2006, 9:31 pm
  4. That’s right: “I own you, your body, and all the children that come from your body….I mean, MY body. It’s mine.”

    Posted by Sophia | October 28, 2006, 10:11 pm
  5. The picture of little Millie breaks my heart. Words fail me. I just want to say HOW COULD HE….HOW *DARE* HE….WHO THE **HELL** DOES HE THINK HE IS??? Anything I could say is just so inadequate. And “I cannot have my way syndrome” is EXACTLY what it is.

    And I am just as mad about the family cats as I am an inveterate animal lover.

    Posted by Branjor | October 28, 2006, 10:17 pm
  6. If this is this guy’s idea of ‘love’, how does he act for ‘hate’?
    Yeah, I’m upset about the kitties as well. What the hell was that about?

    And how much premeditation does one have to do before it’s considered murder – probably a detailed script? What a piece of lowlife scum.

    Posted by stormcloud | October 28, 2006, 10:44 pm
  7. Did you notice his ideal of “fair.” Mommy can have the baby and I can have Millie for comfort. As if, if there is an afterlife he and the little girl will go to the same place. What arrogance.

    Posted by chasingmoksha | October 28, 2006, 11:21 pm
  8. Damn straight, salty. My abusive exes ALL, no exception, knocked themselves out to ruin holidays. ALL.

    And so true, chasingmoksha. How crazed was that. I need company in dying, so I will kill Millie. Unfortunately, he lived (as I believe he knew he would) and Millie died. I hope there is an afterlife for Millie, an amazing, beautiful, woman-only afterlife, in which a huge river of women, all of Millie’s woman ancestors, greet her, and take her along with them into a wonderful, wonderful world of women.

    Heart

    Posted by womensspace | October 29, 2006, 3:11 am
  9. I am crying right now, wishing that I could be swallowed up by a huge river of women and wondering how we go on…

    Posted by Beansa | October 29, 2006, 3:44 am
  10. I’m glad he lived, because he didn’t get away that easy, now if only there is a decent judge he’ll spend a good long miserable time where he can’t control anybody, and hopefully his cell mates will know what he did.

    Posted by saltyC | October 29, 2006, 4:32 am
  11. I left my first husband because he was acting very strange and I read his diary and found out he was convinced I was having an affair and so he was going to kill me, our toddler, and himself. A scenario which is sadly all too typical.

    Posted by Amananta | October 30, 2006, 5:27 pm
  12. OMG Amananta, I am so glad you read that diary and mde him your ex. That is horrifying!

    Salty C and Womans Space, thanks for the Holiday’s points. I had not put that together before. Holy Cow What was up with that? think they thought it through, or is it a knee jerk thing?

    >>>OOOps happy fun time- vibes must destroy-must consume all giggles and hapiness in a three mile radius…>>>

    Posted by hazel8500 | October 31, 2006, 9:46 pm
  13. It is sickening that a murderer will resort to this poetic licence. A Romeo and Juliet moment? How much PR advice is a murderer given?
    He is a murderer – pure and simple and no way is trying to imply that the mother and the man she had sex with (only) twice is a good enough reason to conclude diminsished responsibility. I hope he goes down.
    He killed a child – and the cats – B*stard.
    I have no comprehension of how her mother feels, it’s beyond my comprehension actually. Also to the third man. I have no comprehension of how the hell this poor guy is feeling.I suspect he is feeling responsible for everything. A quick fun fling (for whatever their reasons) two consenting adults have had has resulted in lifelong heartbreak for them both.
    He’s a crazed lunatic and I hope he goes to hell.

    Posted by Dee | October 31, 2006, 10:51 pm
  14. Amananta—yeeeeeeek!!

    What Hazel said, and it’s so good that you knew to take it seriously.

    Posted by saltyC | November 1, 2006, 3:22 pm
  15. He just got sentenced to life, with a minimum tariff of 15 years.

    Posted by stormcloud | November 3, 2006, 11:49 am
  16. this made me cry, I dont know how ANYBODY could murder such a beautiful little BABY girl so innocent and so brave, and yes she was brave. i will be praying for this little girl. the look of her face you can tell that she was and still now is a little angel the most beautiful little angel there could ever be.

    Posted by kirsty | November 12, 2006, 7:22 pm
  17. Look, this is a terrible tragedy & when I first read about it I cried too. That poor little girl. There but for the grace of God. I left my partner to protect my child from harm. We had suffered horrific domestic abuse and I have never regretted my actions. But my ex was defended to the hilt by an extremely sophisticated lawyer who I have now discovered to be the same lawyer with whom Millie’s mother was having an affair. How terribly ironic. How sleazy & how trashy. lets not forget that that the little girl might still be alive had it not been for the actions of that judge (a supposedly respectable family lawyer with little daughters of his own) and Millie’s mother. They met trawling an internet sex site. Who looked after the children when this affair was taking place? What consideration was given to the children? Did the mother parade her infidelities to the father, after all, it has been reported that she wanted him to join a swingers club with her but he refused. The crime the father committed is heinous, that is beyond doubt. But the behaviour of the mother and the judge, in my mind, also contributed to the tragic loss of Millie. One thing I learnt when I was up against that mysogonistic lawyer is that where there is cause there is effect. You have to take responsibility for your actions. Sadly, in this case, an innocent little girl is the victim to the selfish & sleazy adult cause. RIP Millie.

    Posted by amelie | November 14, 2006, 10:31 am
  18. Amelie– no matter what the mother did; no matter what she did — NONE of the responsibility for Millie’s death belongs to her. ABSOLUTELY ZERO. I don’t care if she met men on the internet from sunset to sundown. I don’t care whether she paraded her sexual encounters with other men before this “father” from morning until night.

    Responsibility for Millie’s murder rests SOLELY — SOLELY — with her father. Nothing the mother did had ANYTHING to do with that. NONE. She has ZERO “responsibility” for Millie’s actions. She was not part of ANY “cause” which led to the “effect” of Millie’s death.

    Millie was murdered by her father in cold blood. That is the truth, and it is the entire truth. Her father planned her murder, then murdered her.

    Millie’s mother, no matter WHAT she did, no matter WHAT she did, had NOTHING to do with that.

    To suggest that she did is to be complicit with male terrrorism of girls and women.

    Also. Going to swinger’s clubs, having “affairs,” whatever that means, doesn’t make people bad parents, bad people, or anything of the sort. But even if they did, which they don’t, being a swinger, or having affairs, or meeting people for sex on the internet– NONE of these has ANYTHING to do with this little girl’s murder in cold blood.

    Heart

    Posted by womensspace | November 14, 2006, 5:16 pm
  19. I feel I have to comment on this. I am Millie’s mum and I am very relieved to see that there are some people in this world who can ‘read’ beyond what newspapers choose to print.

    Just to clear a few ‘issues’ up, my now ex-husband was an unpleasant, manipulative, controlling person. For years, I’d put up with demands to have his coffee made the moment he walked in from work, to have dinner on the table at 6pm sharp, to have sex with him when he wanted it (never mind what I wanted). When he didn’t have things his own way, he became sullen and uncommunicative. But he was very clever – he never hit me. He knew if he did, I would immediately leave. He was extremely verbally abusive and I have never in my life been so unhappy.

    I had been faithful to him for our entire relationship until Sept 2005 when I met the ‘judge’. I had reached the point where I was sick of never having time to myself, never having time to be ‘me’. This ‘affair’ was pure escapism. I met the man twice. Plenty of people have affairs that go on for years. Their spouses don’t murder their children for it.

    And Amelie, how DARE you suggest that I neglected my children to slope off to have this ‘affair’?! The first time I met him was an evening – they were at home in bed being cared for by their father. The second time, they were in nursery – where they would have been anyway that day, regardless of what I had planned. I am sorry that you have had a terrible time in your previous relationship. Nobody deserves that, but lawyers get paid a lot of money to represent others – it doesn’t mean that they personally agree with their client.

    And another thing, nobody ever did any swinging! That suggestion was made by my ex-husband, missing the point as ever. He thought that if we joined a swingers club, I could have sex with as many strange men as I wanted under a controlled environment. It never happened.

    I would also like to point out that I had ended the marriage some weeks prior to Millie’s murder. I was planning to move out and was waiting for my references to come through for a house I intended to rent.

    All of the above comments were made public during the trial, but the press only report what they think will sell newspapers. Anyone who cannot see beyond what is printed is clearly lacking in intelligence.

    I have slowly begun to build a new life with my youngest daughter (who is thriving without her ‘father’ but sorely missing her big sister). We miss Millie desperately. I put her ashes inside a teddy so we can cuddle her again. This has had a massive impact on our lives and I am devastated now to learn that he is appealing against his conviction. What he has put us through is much, much greater than any hurt I ever caused him – but I have never contemplated suicide, nor have I thought of taking my remaining daughter’s life. I am not a slag, a tart or a whore, I never paraded my infidelity to taunt him. I was just a desperately unhappy, emotionally abused woman lacking in confidence.

    Sincerest thanks to those of you who left such positive comments, it means a lot to me.

    Posted by Jo | February 20, 2007, 3:42 pm
  20. Thanks for commenting here, Jo, telling your story, and bringing us up to date. Of course you aren’t a whore, a tart, there is nothing wrong with you, you were trying to survive brutality! Any man who would do what your ex did is a brutal, violent abuser whether he ever laid a hand on you or not (and you’re right, there are men who are entirely capable of horrifically abusing a woman without laying a hand on us, thereby covering their tracks and making us to be liars or unstable in the eyes of the stupid and the woman-hating).

    That is also so *classic* that he suggested “swinging,” as though — as in his imagination and nowhere else — that’s something you would have been interested in! That is all about his projections and his determination to own and control you. What is with the way men’s imaginations go fucking wild when they feel they are losing control?

    Thank the goddess that you and your daughter are beginning to rebuild your life. I pray that this man who wanted to destroy both of you, and did destroy Millie, never walks free again, EVER. He is a danger to all women and children and animals.

    Thanks again for your comment, Jo. Please keep us updated– we will stand with you.

    Heart

    Posted by womensspace | February 20, 2007, 4:46 pm
  21. Hi Heart I so fully agree with you about the father being solely responsible for his actions. Deflecting responsibility anywhere else is delusion.
    I keep coming up against this blame the victim mentality and I find it abhorrant.

    Dear Jo, I am so sorry for your loss, for the years of abuse you suffered, for your youngest daughters sadness. I am so glad you are creating a new life, free from the tyranny of you ex.

    He did a horrible horrible thing because he felt his control slipping. I really hope that other women in your situation pay attention and get out before it is too late for one of their precious ones. I hope that women contemplating a relationship with someone who exhibits the qualities you mentioned think twice.

    May your new life be happy and prosperous.
    Hazel.

    Posted by hazel8500 | February 20, 2007, 6:42 pm
  22. All the best to you Jo, I know how hard it is to lose a loved one who is central to your life. Your ex deserves all the blame and condemnation in the world for his deplorable actions. I hope you and your little one will be able to pick up some of the pieces for yourselves.

    Posted by Amy's Brain Today | February 20, 2007, 11:22 pm
  23. Jo, I am so sorry for your loss. And for the record, although I do believe your account of the person that your now ex-husband is and your account of how your marriage with him was, I want you to know that none of that matters. I don’t care if you fucked and sucked and swung all over the damned place with anything and anyone that didn’t try to get away. Nothing you could have done or not done could justify what was done to your little girl and the pain you’ve surely felt from losing her. Nothing.

    Posted by CoolAunt | February 20, 2007, 11:46 pm
  24. His trying to make you the reason for his behaviour is what a smart lawyer will use against him. It’s the addict’s excuse, the drunk’s excuse, the sociopath’s excuse. Ask your lawyer to talk to a psychiatrist who is an expert in those kinds of dysfunctional personalities. The lawyer could arrange to have an assessement done on him.

    Do not allow him to make you feel responsible. Hold your head up. You are a survivor and a mother to your remaining child who needs to see that you are STRONG. Your husband also needs to see that you are not playing his co-dependent game any longer.

    Posted by Pony | February 21, 2007, 12:45 am
  25. Jo

    Cool Aunt said it! Please do not ever feel you need to justify your actions nor make excuses for anything you did. There is nothing in this world that could justify taking a beautiful little girl’s life. I believe there is such a thing as evil in this world and your ex is an excellent example of that evil. It’s so sad that you would even have to feel like you should defend your actions, whereabouts, kids whereabouts, etc. Good grief!!! As if that had anything to do with this! Please know that you are in my prayers. Hang tough!

    Posted by macs grandy | February 21, 2007, 3:49 am
  26. Hi Jo

    Please also accept my condolences for your tragic loss. I run the Domestic Violence Memorial blog (for UK victims). I had already put Millie on the Memorial, but would welcome any contribution (or amendments/corrections) that you wish to make. Heart is welcome to pass on my email address to you if you wish to contact me. (The blog hasn’t been updated for a while due to my new job, but I intend to rectify this.)

    It would be good to get your (full) story out there, unlike via the heavily biased national media. Hall’s actions were inexcusable (and I’m including his treatment of you in the marriage). Unfortunately there are a lot of abusive men about—two women per week in the UK are murdered by their partners or ex-partners (in fact, a woman is twice as likely to be killed if she is leaving or has left the relationship). This was the point of starting the Memorial blog, to raise that awareness, as only a fraction of the homicides are reported in the national news (less than 5% I would think).

    Actually, you were lucky not get prosecuted under Section 5 of the Domestic Violence Crimes and Victim Act (2004), as several women have now found themselves in that position after their children have been murdered by abusive spouses.

    I am so glad that you are now free of him, but what a heavy price to pay. I also understand as one who lost a younger sibling through accidental death at an early age (and as a survivor of DV).

    And I would fully agree with what Heart had said in response to Amelie “Responsibility for Millie’s murder rests SOLELY — SOLELY — with her father. Nothing the mother did had ANYTHING to do with that. NONE.”

    Gavin Hall is an abusive, vindictive, scumbag. (I stand by my earlier comments on this thread).

    Posted by stormy | February 21, 2007, 11:18 am

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